Truth and Reality - Confessions of a Perfectionist

Originally posted as a FB note on: November 26, 2014

Reality:

There are times, like today, when I feel my best just isn't good enough. I'm at a place in life that I realize all that I give, the best that I give, is not adequate, I just fall short. This fact, this reality, has recently smacked me upside my head. I'd like to think that my best is good enough - that I can take care of everything myself - but it's just not possible. I've never felt as inadequate as I did today, I'm not enough. I have more of this to face in the near future. It's sad, it's real, it's true -- my best isn't good enough.

My best isn't good enough. My best falls short many times. Knowing this will never stop me from trying. It will never stop me from giving my best. Every.Single.Time. It's not in me to give up. Not in me to quit. Not in me to stop trying.

Truth:

If my best were good enough, I would have no need for God. I would have no need for a redeemer, a savior, a God who extends his had to reach further than mine could ever could reach.

I couldn't reach my brother. When I think of him I think my failure to reach him, but I'm confident that God reached him.

I can't take perfect care of my husband. When I think about the task set before me my knees buckle, but God knows what he needs.

No matter how hard I try, I'm always forgetting something, but somehow, someway, God always covers me.

Faults. Imperfections. Inadequacies. Weaknesses. I'm human.

He is Sovereign.

I'm weak. My best isn't good enough. BUT God.

God uses these faults, imperfections, inadequacies and weaknesses that are within me. They bring me to my knees. They bring me to a place of understanding who I am and who He is. Perfect. Sufficient. Merciful. Faithful. God. He is enough. He is strong. He is with me, in me. When I am at my weakest, He is made strong through me. My best is brought to naught and my worst is brought to worship before the King. His grace is sufficient.

He is made strong. His grace is enough.

"Because of the extravagance of those revelations, and so I wouldn’t get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan’s angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn’t think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then he told me, My grace is enough; it’s all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness. Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ’s strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become." (2 Corinthians 12:7-10 MSG)