Truth and Reality: From me to me

Originally posted as a FB note on September 18, 2014

Reality:

For me, one of the most difficult places in my life is one where I cannot plan ahead.  A place where I can't figure out what I'm going to do next or what the most logical "next step" is.  

I'm a planner.  

I'm an organizer.

I'm a project manager.  

I'm an administrator.  

I do things in the most effective and efficient manner.  "Organized Chaos" is what some people call it.  I just call it "keeping things together". How else could I have simultaneously handled my 4 sons' different baseball practice and game schedules while working full time, owning a small business, and pastoring a church?  Or most recently, working a stressful 40+ hour a week job, going to school full time, working as a Personnel Commissioner, caring for an ill spouse and being deeply involved in ministry? It's just what I do and I can't do it without an extreme amount of planning and organization. 

I find it's most difficult when I come to a place and there is no plan to be formulated, even "drafted" because there is NOTHING that can be seen by my eyes to get me out, through, or over.  It's sort of like being surrounded by enemies and knowing I don't have enough soldiers or strength to fight to a victory or even to defend my only treasure, my life.  It's having Pharaoh and his army behind me and the Red Sea in front, no place to go, no strategy to be crafted on my own.  

That is when I must become fully surrendered to the One who knows the plan for my life. Surrendering is difficult for everyone, but what's most difficult for me is seemingly "being in the dark", not knowing where my life is headed.  All I want is to KNOW.  How long am I to say here?  How long do I have to wait?  What's my timeline?  I'm positive I'll get through, that's really not the problem. I have a God who cares for me, protects me, guides me and helps me.  I just want to KNOW how and when He's going to do it!  I want the plan, the strategy, ahead of time.  Because, after all, that's what *I* do, that's how *I* think, that's how *I* work.

Truth:

I have never been known to mince words, to sugar coat a situation.  I'm straightforward and honest. I just don't know how else to be.  I'm working on smoothing out the "harsh" Becky, but sometimes a dose of truth is really needed in our lives - Straight. Up. Truth.  The type of truth that makes you "shut yo mouth". The type of truth that brings you to your knees in humility and reverence to a Holy God the Creator of the Universe.

From me to me: In all my honesty:

The fact of the matter is, it doesn't matter what I think or how I work. 

Point blank: God doesn't work the way I work, so just zip it and let it go.  No matter how much I beg and plead, God is God and He will do what He wills, not what I want just because I want it.  If he decides to reveal the how and when, then He will.  Otherwise, it's time to be still and see the salvation of the Lord.  There's no plan except for the Plan of God for my life.  There is no path except for the Path of God for my life.  Not the plan *I* set in order, but the Plan that has been set for me from the foundations of the earth.  

Settle down, Becky.  God's Word will do the work He has sent it out to do. Be still. Wait. God is Sovereign: supreme; absolute, unlimited; boundless; ultimate. Give up your plans, Becky and let God’s plan rule your life.  His plan brings Peace, Joy and fulfilment of your destiny.

Alright already!

Isaiah 55:8-11 The Message (MSG)

 8-11 “I don’t think the way you think. The way you work isn’t the way I work.”  God’s Decree. “For as the sky soars high above earth, so the way I work surpasses the way you work, and the way I think is beyond the way you think. Just as rain and snow descend from the skies and don’t go back until they’ve watered the earth, Doing their work of making things grow and blossom, producing seed for farmers and food for the hungry, So will the words that come out of my mouth not come back empty-handed. They’ll do the work I sent them to do, they’ll complete the assignment I gave them.